Monday, May 31, 2010
Joba, Joba, Joba, Joba......Bing, Bing, Bing
the original
You've heard all about your raggy melody
Everything from opera down to harmony
But I've a little song that I will sing to you
It's gonna win you through and through
There ain't much to the words but the music is grand
And you'll be a-singing it to beat the band
You've heard of the tisket and tasket it's true
But give a little listen to this will you?
Ja-Da, Ja-Da, Ja-Da, Ja-Da
Jing, Jing, Jing
Ja-Da, Ja-Da, Ja-Da, Ja-Da
Jing, Jing, Jing
That's a funny little bit of melody
It's so soothing and appealing to me
It goes Ja-Da, Ja-Da, Ja-Da, Ja-Da
Jing, Jing, Jing
The Joba Version:
we've heard all about the games you've blown
and your favorite excuse "not attacking the zone"
But I've a little song that I will sing to you
It's gonna win you through and through
There ain't much to the words but it has a beat
And you'll be a-singing it on your next defeat
You've heard of the tisket and tasket it's true
But give a little listen to this will you?
joba, joba, joba, joba
bing, bing, bing
joba, joba, joba, joba
bing, bing, bing
That's a funny little bit of melody
It's so soothing, it won't let fans think
otherwise we'd all turn to drink
It goes joba, joba, joba, joba
bing, bing, bing
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Friday, May 28, 2010
May The Curse Rain Down His Legs Forever
MLB had youtube remove the videos of the best Yankee blog. May the curse of Chan Flo Park rain down Bud's legs for eternity.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
If Joba Had A Brain
I could while away past-life hours, conferrin' with hank bauer
Consultin' with johnny sain
And my balls I'd be scratchin' while
I avoid all trim for snatchin
If I only had a brain.
I'd strike out every batter their talent wouldn't matter
My stuff would be insane
With the thoughts you'll be thinkin'
He's no longer that hick from Lincoln
If I only had a brain.
Oh, I could convince you why sterlings not a boor
And make up many reasons you'd want to hear him more
While I develop new pitches to explore
I would not be just son of Harlan who fist pumps like a moron
My pitch choice not inane
I would dance and be merry, my delivery smooth as perry
If I only had a brain.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
The Party's Over
The ball games over
It's time to call it a day
The Mets burst our balloon
And taken our pride away
It's time to wind up the masquerade
Just make your mind up father time must be paid
The party's over
Jete flickers and dims
Can't go to his left or his right
Tex's balls don't take off in flight or have any vim
Now you must wake up, all dreams must end
Take off your jock strap, the party's over
It's all over, my friend
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Hey Russo
Dedicated to Yankee rookie, Kevin Russo
A rook went back to NY City
Because Winns' play was pure chicanery
Thames takes chances and Jorg got bonged
And in a minute, he's righted wrong
Hey, Russo! Russo Italiano!
Hey, Russo! Russo Italiano!
Go, go, go you mixed up Sicialiano (or Neapolitano)
All you calabraise-a hit the ball like a crazy with a
Hey, Russo!, there's no more Yogi Berra
Hey Russo, no more that Scooter fella
Hey, Russo! Russo Italiano!
Try an enchilada with da fish a bac a lab and then a
Hey goombah, I love a how you hits go boombah
But take a some advice paisano
From A-Rod, your new found bro
Get some dates with Kate
It will power every at-plate
Friday, May 21, 2010
New York House and School of Industry: 120 West 16th Street
Prior to Class Size Matters' 2nd Annual Skinny Awards Arthur Goldstein and I discovered this beautiful building on 16th Street.
Was the headquarters of an organization that taught needletrades (and later typing) to needy women. In 1955, it was sold to the Friends of Hebrew Culture. Now the Young Adults Institute, a home for people with cognitive disabilities. This 1878 building is considered the first Queen Anne-style structure in the city.an excerpt from the nytimes streetscapes
STREETSCAPES: The New York House and School of Industry; Where the Poor Learned 'Plain and Fine Sewing'
By CHRISTOPHER GRAY
THIS summer the New York House and School of Industry at 120 West 16th Street promised to shape up as a major preservation battle for the fall. Built in 1878, the two-story building was marked for replacement by an apartment house, and the Landmarks Preservation Commission has scheduled a hearing on it for Sept. 15.
But in late July, the owner discovered that the State of New York had taken the property by eminent domain. Now, it will remain as a residence for the mentally retarded, no longer immediately threatened.
Charity was a growth industry in mid-19th century New York. Cities were indifferent to the health and housing needs of the poor and the working class, leading concerned private citizens to form several new charities a year. Many were unusually specific. For example, one asylum took only Protestant half-orphans.
Most had a moral purpose, encouraging those in difficulty to improve their lot by ''industry,'' rather than by vice, crime or insurrection.
The New York House and School of Industry was founded in 1851 to teach poor women ''plain and fine sewing.'' For some time, it was quartered in an old wooden farmhouse on its present site, but in 1878 the organization built an asymmetrical brick building designed by Sidney V. Stratton.
The building is still largely unchanged, with a projecting two-story oriel window on the left, a central entrance and top and bottom triple windows on the right. Above the main door, a tablet bears the organization's name and the date of construction in elaborate script, still legible, although slathered with paint. The overall form of the building is picturesque, and windows make up the greatest element of decoration: the oriel has panes of bottle ends and some of the windows have 44 panes in the top sash over four panes in the bottom.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
How Do You Solve A Problem Like The Joba
His fastball climbs and often blinds
But many times it's neither here nor there
He does a dance and pumps his fist
And practices that scary stare
Yet sadly underneath that gangster brim
Lies a brain that's short on vim and long on mist
Many a thing you know you'd like to tell him
Many a thing he ought to understand
But how do you make him stay
And listen to all you say
How do you keep games lost by his hand
How do you solve a problem like the Joba
How do you stop the saves he blows and keep his era down
How do you solve a problem like the Joba
A cinch to upset. Fans are all pissed. A clown
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Saturday, May 15, 2010
You'll Wonder Where The Yellow Went
Hey, hey Suzy Q.What's cookin with you?
Your teeth look whiter then new, new, new
My teeth aren't new
But my toothpaste is
New pepsodent
Get with it kid
New package
New flavor
New formula too
Means brighter smiles
For me and you
You’ll wonder where the yellow went
When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent.
The new formula
With imp
Gets teeth much whiter
You can see
It cleans the stains and film away
While irium
Fights tooth decay
You’ll wonder where the yellow went
When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent.
The taste is new
So fresh and clean
That new taste really lasts, it's keen
And while it makes your smile a rave
It also makes breath behave
So start going steady right away
With pepsodent
Get some today
You’ll wonder where the yellow went
When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent.
Pepsodent., Pepsodent.,
The A-Rod version.
Many are wondering where his power went.
Can the switch to Cameron from Kate be the reason?
After a weak April at the plate, Yankees slugger Alex Rodriguez has been getting on base consistently in May — but his power numbers still haven’t rebounded.Until last night when he hit a grand slam homer.
In fact, A-rod’s been looking a lot more like teammate Nick Johnson as of late. He’s compiled a very good .408 on-base percentage in May, with 13 hits, 7 walks, and only five strikeouts this month.
However, he’s gone deep just once in his last 20 games, with only four total extra base hits in that span.
In fact, Rodriguez — one of the most prolific power hitters of all time — has only three home runs in 147 plate appearances this year, putting him on pace for…brace yourself…fourteen home runs in 2010. Barring injury, we’re sure A-Rod will wind up with far more homers than that. He’ll likely hit close to double that amount, in fact, if last season is any indicator (he missed the first month of 2009 due to injury and wound up with 30)
Hey, hey A-rod, eyes of blue
What's cookin with you?
Your power went away like the birds that flew
My power lost, that's just not true
Got me a new Hammer-on
With new Camer-on
Though some may wonder
That yellow still makes me hyper-vent
There's a different pep
For this studly gent
New package
New flavor
New formula too
Just give it time
Soon balls will climb
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Saturday, May 08, 2010
Tuesday, May 04, 2010
Numbnuts
There's been all this talk about a comment that Michael Mulgrew supposedly made about Joel Klein.
He may have used the description "numbnuts." I tried to visualize the concept, a scary thought.
Maybe he goes jogging at the beach with this get-up and needs to apply an ice pack. It must hurt.
He may have used the description "numbnuts." I tried to visualize the concept, a scary thought.
Maybe he goes jogging at the beach with this get-up and needs to apply an ice pack. It must hurt.
Monday, May 03, 2010
Love Those Orioles In Birdland
Sunday's win marked Baltimore's first series sweep of the season and first home three-game series sweep of the Red Sox since Sept. 2-4, 1974.
This inspired some new Birdland lyrics
In the middle of that hub
I remember one sad club
Where Bosox went to beat
Down near sultan's home street
Everybody flipped the bird
To a team nicknamed the birds
Where beantown pitchers twirled
Like the best in all the world
The records achieved there
Were beyond compare
Birdland, I'm singing
Birdland
Birdland, Old losin' Birdland
Hey man, the O's would really turn you on.
Really? but things have just turned around.
Down them stairs, old winners beware
Where? Down in Birdland
Booming swings, now Birds are kings
There, down in Birdland
Tejada would cook, Papi would look
Where? Down in Birdland
Ohnan came through, Nick came too.
There, down in Birdland
Papelbon got screwed, J.D. too
Where? Down in Birdland
Orioles played hard ball
Now Tremblay won't fall
There, down in Birdland, Yeah
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